Senior Community Friendships
“A stranger is a friend you haven’t met yet” - William Butler, Poet
June 8 is National Best Friends Day! It’s a day to let your friends know that you appreciate their friendship. Whether they are old or new, life is so much more enriching with our pals! They are the ones who help us through tough times and laugh with us through the best of times. Even though senior living communities are great places to meet new people, making new friends isn’t always easy. That’s okay! Be patient and kind with yourself and others. You may feel like a fish out of water at first, but our staff and residents are ready to welcome you to your new home. We asked a few of our residents– Estelle, Faye, Judith, Pat, Brian, Marilyn, and Lynda– for advice on how to make new friends in senior communities and for what they feel are the rewards of friendship.
Health Benefits
“One of the things I’ve been reading up is there’s really only three things that we can do to stay alive: exercise, eat right, and be happy. For being happy, it’s incredibly important to socialize as a human being. This seems to work so well here to socialize, and there’s good food, and exercise.” – Brian, resident for less than a year
There are many studies on the health benefits of social connection, and it is often a predictor of longevity. Some studies have even suggested that being lonely can be as risky as smoking 15 cigarettes a day. Connection and community can also reduce stress and blood pressure, help our immune system, and improve cognition - among many other health benefits.
Best of Both Worlds
“That’s the thing about living in this type of environment is the connection. We could live in a condo by ourselves and there’s a lot less connection there because they are pretty independent. We are independent in the lodge too, but we connect with people every day and I think for mental health that’s good.” – Lynda, resident for 12 years
“It was nice, actually. I’ve been alone for so many years, it was nice to have someone to talk to!” – Pat, resident for 2 years
“I don’t regret coming in. I had groups that I belonged to but they all had family around and I didn’t, so I felt left out. In here, even if it’s boring on the weekends, there’s somebody to say- it’s boring - to!” – Marilyn, resident for nearly 4 years
Seniors who have lived alone for many years can enjoy the company of the other staff and residents in the building, while also living independently in their own suites and apartments.
Be Persistent
“You’ve got to put yourself out there. I just persisted. I wouldn’t give up.” – Estelle, resident for 6 years
“I was nervous at first but you’ve got to push yourself.” – Judith, resident for 2 years
Maybe you already have an acquaintance that you can catch up with. Ask the lodge manager or activity coordinator if there are new residents in the building. Take the first step to welcome them and say “Hi!” Maybe try going out of your comfort zone a bit and sit with a new group of people at meal times or coffee time.
Try an Activity
“It’s more fun participating than it is watching” – Judith, resident for 2 years
“And you get to laugh at yourself!” – Faye, resident for 6 years
“It’s just about getting those people out to the activities and supporting them. Once you’re in exercise, we’ve got you! Then we invite everyone to go for coffee. Come to exercise and you’re hooked!” – Estelle, residents for 6 years
For anyone who is nervous about trying activities, our residents suggest coming out to an exercise class at the lodge. It’s a great ice breaker for social interaction, and you also get some healthy exercise. Now that’s a win-win situation!
Welcome New Community Members
“New ones have come in and you just say, ‘nice to meet you! Enjoy your new home!’ To sit back and not say anything to any of them is not fair! I wouldn’t want to come in here and have nobody talk to me.” – Faye, resident for 6 years
“I always remember my first day here when a few ladies saw me standing at the doorway and they invited me in to have my supper with them. That made a difference. That made me feel right away that things were going to be okay.” – Judith, resident for 2 years
“The first thing that came to mind when I moved in is that this is now my home. I’m bound to have a relationship with everybody that’s in here. I try to be cooperative.” – Brian, resident for less than a year
“I made sure from then on, any new person that came here, I welcomed them and made sure to invite them to coffee.” – Estelle, resident for 6 Years
If you are not a new resident yourself, put yourself in the shoes of someone who just moved in. A simple gesture can make all the difference to a new member of your community.
Staff are Here to Help
“Staff are wonderful. They help people get out of their shells. You can ask any of them anything!” – resident group together (Estelle, Faye, Judith, Pat, Lynda, Brian, and Marilyn)
I have heard of a large number of people who have gone to other places before this one who said the activity coordinator here is absolutely fabulous! – Brian, resident for less than a year
“My kids even love her!” – Estelle, resident for 6 years
Staff spend almost as much time at the lodge as residents do, and some have been working at the lodge for a long time. Our staff get to know nearly everyone in the lodge and can be a friendly face when you don’t know anybody. They are more than happy to help you settle into your new home!
Be Patient
Remember to be patient and kind to yourself. Friendships take time, but senior living communities make it easier to break the ice! Our residents are ready to greet you with open arms and invite you to morning coffee. It may be uncomfortable at first but keep at it!
Apply to a Green Acres Foundation community today and be one step closer to meeting your new friends! Click here to fill out an application or call us at 403-328-1155.